www.inkthinkerblog.com — Either she really liked my post, or she’s sucking up because she wants a kooshy staff position on the Formerly-From-New-York-But-Moved-To-Virginia-er. Thanks for the link, Alicia. :]

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www.kristenkingfreelancing.com
Finalist in 2006 Writer’s Digest Best Writer’s Website Contest

Contents Copyright © 2006-2014 Kristen King

www.inkthinkerblog.com — Okay, so on top of the ongoing Technorati frustration, which at this point is actually getting to be a little funny because it’s so ridiculously not happening, and on top of the fact that I’ve been feeling like crap the last two days, and on top of the fact that I got whistled at in the Food Lion parking lot by a Fredneck (Um, because yeah, I really want to come get in your old rusted-out pick-up truck. Are you going to move the dog and the shotgun first, or do I just sit in the back?), and on top of the fact that I have somehow lost or otherwise deleted a dozen critical files and/or folders, I just walked into my bedroom to find that it is INFESTED WITH ANTS. They weren’t there earlier, but man, they are now.

First they were in the kitchen.

Then they were in the candy dish in the living room.

Then they were in the fruit bowl in the dining room table.

Then they were in the office.

NOW, despite the fact that we have Home-Defensensed every square inch of the foundation, baseboards, and walls in the house within a foot of the ground repeatedly, they have somehow managed to get UP THE FRONT OF MY HOUSE AND IN THROUGH THE WINDOW IN THE CLOSET OF MY BEDROOM. (Yes, there is a window in my closet. A full-size window. And no, it’s not a walk-in. My theory is that the guy who designed the house forgot to put a closet in the bedroom and was like, “Crap, the only place for a closet is in front of that window! Oh well.”)

Oh, and that’s not all. Once they conquered the two-story climb and made it past my shoes, no small feat when you’re only 1/16″ big, they made a beeline (antline?) for the sink in my bedroom. (Yes, there’s a sink in my bedroom. There’s one in the office, too, but not in the bathroom. My theory is that they guy who designed the house forgot to leave enough room for a real bathroom and did some damage control. I’m not a big fan of the guy who designed the house.) So now my entire sink, counter, and PLACE WHERE I KEEP MY TOOTHBRUSH are crawling with ants. And my husband is sealing the deck right now and can’t help me, so THEY’RE STILL THERE.

Can I have a do-over? Seriously, can I just do today over? That would be great. At least I have The New Yorker…

Kristen

P.S. When I spell-checked this post, I was delighted to find that “Fredneck” is already an acceptable term in the Google spell check dictionary. Nice.

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www.kristenkingfreelancing.com
Finalist in 2006 Writer’s Digest Best Writer’s Website Contest

Contents Copyright © 2006-2014 Kristen King

www.inkthinkerblog.com — Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain again. Thank you for your patience during this bumpy ride. Unfortunately, despite our best efforts and a brief period of being bright orange and having a right-justified sidebar, we have not been able to reach our Technorati destination. This flight will be making an unscheduled landing in The Only Blog Left That’s Not on Technorati and is not expected to depart any time soon.

Enjoy the rest of your movie.

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www.kristenkingfreelancing.com
Finalist in 2006 Writer’s Digest Best Writer’s Website Contest

Contents Copyright © 2006-2014 Kristen King

www.inkthinkerblog.com — Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We’re experiencing some turbulence as we attempt to enter Technorati airspace, so we’re going to need to make some changes to our flight plan to get things worked out. If you happen to notice your sidebar blinking on and off or any spontaneous template changes, simply tighten your seat belt and try to relax.

In the unlikely event that there is a crash, your seat cushion can be used as a floatation device. Honest. It’s holding you up right now, isn’t it? Just trust me on this one. We hope to be through this rough patch in the next half hour. In the meantime, please sit back and enjoy your in-flight movie, Alive.
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www.kristenkingfreelancing.com
Finalist in 2006 Writer’s Digest Best Writer’s Website Contest

Contents Copyright © 2006-2014 Kristen King